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I give up. ServerFault has been overrun by idiots and people that bought their first Ubuntu VPS an hour ago.

Everybody has to start somewhere. Why does that somewhere always have to be here?

It's clear that nary a single person reads anything here on their first visit beyond 'serverfault' (hey, I have a server! That's the place for me!#@) or even the 'post your question' button. Several times daily one has to ask 'what's your question?'.

I'm insulted by this. I will spend no more time on your question than it appears you put into asking it. Except when..

If it seems like you tried only once without bothering to even understand what it is you're doing before asking a question here... I'll probably spend quite a lot of time with your post. Just know that my comments and answers are filled with an incalculable number of f-bombs and gfy's via invisible type. You can imagine how it sounds as if I was saying it to you right now, out loud. I sound like Rob Schneider pretending to have a deep voice. Now say it out loud. You can do it! F___ Y__ and G_ F___ Y____s___!

If you're asking yourself 'Who is Rob Schneider?' right now, then please do this site a favor. Put down your VPS on digitalocean or your dedicated Hetzner root server and pick up a book on Linux. Sorry Windows guys, my skillset ends at Steam as do my witty references. Something about cake being untrue? I guess I could talk about Trumpet Winsock as well.

Seriously, what the flippity flap is a root server? Is it some magical place where all the sysadmins go to never have to deal with a failed DIMM or a backhoe molesting fiber ever again? And why do you think that matters when your problem is not hardware or network related?

50% of the posts here are questions that could possibly be relevant on day 1 of your 'Learn Linux' class. 50% of the posts are simply seeking free consultations. The other half are just stupid. Yes. 150% of the posts to Serverfault could be solved by reading a man page or even just the error you're actually pasting into the question.

I come here looking for challenging problems completely unrelated to what I'm being paid to work on when I need a break. 90% of the new posters here are simply too lazy to use google. If you actually do search google and see nothing about your problem, realize that the odds are about 300:1 that this has been solved and blogged about several times already. Research at least to the point where you know what to call the thing you're dealing with. You can't walk into a vet's office and say my uhh... you know.. not working. You can't do that shit here either.

I can't wait until the day all you devops and cloud enabled simpletons have a real problem to solve. You're going to get the middle finger and then you're going to lose your job to people that actually know how to fix things.