The question, as it was on ServerFault can be found herehere and the SuperUser version can be found here. It's clearly server related - I'm trying to establish a local database server for use in development. This is the same software that resides on servers that power websites and enterprise applications - if anyone was to be able to answer my question, it would be the people who regularly install and maintain database servers, not the typical household PC user that you can find on SuperUser.