So what are you trying to accomplish, exactly?

I mean, here's your example:

It got deleted in under two hours and never got an answer. Closing it would've accomplished nothing; all closing does is prevent answers and make questions eligible for deletion.

Sorry if that comes off as patronizing; we've had this discussion a few times over on Stack Overflow, and every time I get the feeling that folks don't quite understand what closing does. And unfortunately, I'm getting the same impression here reading this discussion. You're laying out a bunch of problems and then... proposing a solution that doesn't address them.

So just to reiterate...

Closing a question accomplishes two things:

1. Stops answers from being posted.
2. Makes the question eligible for fast deletion.

Crucially, closing doesn't downvote the post. Not even once. Definitely not some sort of "super-downvote". It doesn't hide posts from the homepage, or deemphasize them in search results. It does feed into the logic that'll rate-limit or block users from asking questions, but carries no more weight there than a plain old run-of-the-mill downvote - by which I mean that one closed question, 5 close votes from the pool of 3000-rep privileged users, does about as much to stop repeat questions as that one downvote from someone with 125 rep.

Why am I harping on downvotes? Because, over the past 30 days, y'all have down-voted 1162 questions at least once... While voting to close 1273. In other words, I get the distinct impression that you're already using the wrong tool for the job in many cases, and are seeking ways in which you can expand on that usage.

Remember: your example involved someone asking a question, raging impotently against anonymous downvoters, and then deleting his own question. If you're trying to get rid of someone, it's really hard to beat that for an outcome.

So again: what problem are you trying to solve here?

So what are you trying to accomplish, exactly?

I mean, here's your example:

It got deleted in under two hours and never got an answer. Closing it would've accomplished nothing; all closing does is prevent answers and make questions eligible for deletion.

Sorry if that comes off as patronizing; we've had this discussion a few times over on Stack Overflow, and every time I get the feeling that folks don't quite understand what closing does. And unfortunately, I'm getting the same impression here reading this discussion. You're laying out a bunch of problems and then... proposing a solution that doesn't address them.

So just to reiterate...

Closing a question accomplishes two things:

1. Stops answers from being posted.
2. Makes the question eligible for fast deletion.

Crucially, closing doesn't downvote the post. Not even once. Definitely not some sort of "super-downvote". It doesn't hide posts from the homepage, or deemphasize them in search results. It does feed into the logic that'll rate-limit or block users from asking questions, but carries no more weight there than a plain old run-of-the-mill downvote - by which I mean that one closed question, 5 close votes from the pool of 3000-rep privileged users, does about as much to stop repeat questions as that one downvote from someone with 125 rep.

Why am I harping on downvotes? Because, over the past 30 days, y'all have down-voted 1162 questions at least once... While voting to close 1273. In other words, I get the distinct impression that you're already using the wrong tool for the job in many cases, and are seeking ways in which you can expand on that usage.

Remember: your example involved someone asking a question, raging impotently against anonymous downvoters, and then deleting his own question. If you're trying to get rid of someone, it's really hard to beat that for an outcome.

So again: what problem are you trying to solve here?