The question you asked (
Why is my question a shopping type of question?) has already been thoroughly answered by Mark Henderson, so I'm going to address the question you didn't ask --
How can I ask this question without it being a "shopping question"?
Your question is currently a shopping question because you are asking, essentially, for a list of products/services/software/etc. -- If that's really what you want Server Fault isn't the right place to ask (Google is far better at giving people lists of things than we are, and stays up to date all on its own).
Your question can be transformed into a good, constructive question if you can change it from "Give me a list of things that do X" to "I have Y tools available, and I need to do X -- How can I accomplish this?".
In your specific case you've already given yourself the framework of what needs to be done (it's in your question). Based on what you say in your question I think the most likely suggestion would be "break out your favorite scripting language and start writing a script to meet your needs", which isn't a very helpful answer (and would probably get the question shut down as "too localized" since it's only likely to be helpful for your specific environment).
Server Fault also isn't a scripting repository, so you're unlikely to get "teh c0dez" (a fully working script) handed to you for any question ; If you have problems writing the script though you could ask about the specific issues you encounter here (as it's a server administration script) or on Unix & Linux, which also sees a lot of questions and answers about scripting issues.